When knitting really is therapy

Who needs therapy when you have your knitting?  Let me explain. I woke up looking for my mother today. I had a dream so vivid I was sure I would see her when I opened my eyes. She was yelling like only she could, trying to make me get out of the bed. I  opened my eyes and the tears fell instantly.  I am so sure I need therapy, but instead I knit.

The first thing I did was grab my “Mommy” shawl. What is a mommy shawl GG? is that your question? Well the answer is the shawl that I cast on her first birthday in heaven. It’s a shawl that I knit in her favorite color. It’s a shawl that I grab when I miss her most. It’s a shawl I grab when I need my mommy close.  Red was never my thing, but now when I see it I smile a big old cheesy grin. I feel comforted, like she is hugging me when I wear red. So today my red knitted shawl was my therapy, my doctor because before I got dressed I wrapped it around my shoulders and remembered the sound of my mother’s yelling voice.  I am so sure I need therapy, but I’d rather knit.

IMG_1504

The pattern is actually called Nae by Anat Rodan. The yarn is La Jolla by Baah! The shawl is one of the first I did on small needles (US6) and with such a small weight of yarn (fingering). It took me about 2 weeks to complete, and I was so happy that I finished it by mother’s day. The first mother’s day without my mommy and that is why I named it “Mommy” so instead of crying all day, I wrapped myself in my knitting, in my memories and I survived….Therapy

Knit on my fiber friends….knit on

~GG

15 thoughts on “When knitting really is therapy”

  1. Thank you for sharing your story with us.I had a very different relationship with my mother.she passed on a few years ago.in my projects on ravelry,there is a shawl called “hippiekiwi”. The notes tell a story about my mother and how the shawl got its name.(I’m grannysticks).your shawl pattern ” nae” is now in my pattern library.I have beautiful sock yarn looking for a project.thank you again.

  2. Thank you for sharing your story with us.I had a very different relationship with my mother.she passed on a few years ago.in my projects on ravelry,there is a shawl called “hippiekiwi”. The notes tell a story about my mother and how the shawl got its name.(I’m grannysticks).your shawl pattern ” nae” is now in my pattern library.I have beautiful sock yarn looking for a project.thank you again.

  3. Gaye, this was very touching. I ciuld relate to this. I lost my mother also and miss her so ouch. Regardless that it’s been 15 yrs since she’s been gone, the sadness that I feel is like it was yesterday. Her favorite color was Kelly Green. 😢😢

  4. My mom’s favourite colour was “apricot”…I never realized how much APRICOT I surround myself with..I look in my stash….APRICOT…my flower gardens….APRICOT….❤️ Good thing it’s one of my faves as well!😊

  5. Thank you for sharing your story about your Mom. Your words touched me deeply. I lost my Mom in 2008. I learned to knit to help me cope with my loss. It makes me sad that I will never be able to knit anything for my Mom. However I have knit for her sister and I find joy and peace in that. Hugs to you!

Leave a Comment

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.